Multigenerational caregivers spend over two and a half hours a day on unpaid care. For moms, caregiving duties go up to three hours a day. If you fit the sandwich generation definition, it’s easy to see why this type of care can cause you to feel anxious and stressed. 

Unfortunately, parents stuck in the sandwich generation might stay stuck for longer than they hope — today, adult children are relying on the support of their parents more than ever. 

52% of young adults lived with their parents in July 2020. This is the highest it’s been since the Great Depression. At that time, it was 48%. For adults between 25 and 34 years old, the number is estimated at 17.8%.

On top of that, the U.S. population is aging, which means more people will need to care for their aging parents. Baby boomers, who are currently between 57 and 75 years old, are a large generation. As a result of their aging, the 65-and-older population grew by 34.2% over the past ten years.

To highlight the impact of this aging population, the U.S.’s median age increased from 37.2 years in 2010 to 38.4 in 2019. Older people are even projected to outnumber children by 2030, which will be a first in U.S. history.

Increased life expectancy further amplifies this impact. People across the world are just living longer. Yet there’s been no significant change in the level of mild to moderate disability for older people. So people live for longer, but they don’t live healthier lives.

This means multigenerational caregivers will need to care for their aging parents for longer periods of time — in addition to their older children. That’s exactly the sandwich generation definition, and it can be extremely stressful for those who are part of it.

How common is the sandwich generation? 

As we mentioned above, 12% of parents are part of the sandwich generation. Researchers also found that 31% of the sandwich generation was made up of Hispanics. That’s more than white or black members of the sandwich generation, which make up 24% and 21% respectively.

What age is the sandwich generation? 

Middle-aged adults make up the sandwich generation. They are most likely from Generation X, between the ages of 40-59. However, according to a Pew Research Center survey, 19% are millennials younger than 40 and at least 10% are older than 60.

Examples of the sandwich generation 

Let’s make the sandwich generation definition super clear with some examples. 

• You’re a 35-year-old woman who just had her first child. While taking care of a newborn, you also have to check in on your 60-year-old parents who are beginning to have health problems. The burden will only grow as your child gets older. 
• Your 28-year-old son is still living at home and relies on you financially — maybe because they have a disability or the economy is preventing them from getting a job. You also have your 75-year-old mom living with you because she can’t afford a senior living home. You must support both generations at one time. 
• You have three kids under the age of five running around. They keep you busy enough, but your 65-year-old dad has been suffering major health problems. You must make time to visit him, take him to doctor's appointments, and give your kids attention, too. Not to mention, find time to go to work. 

  How do you survive the sandwich?

  If you find yourself meeting the definition of the sandwich generation, take a deep breath. Know that it is possible to manage the stress associated with this position. Here are four tips to reduce your stress levels and survive your time as a multigenerational caregiver:

  1. Prioritize self-care

  If you don’t care for yourself, you won’t be in a good position to care for your loved ones. This can lead to emotional exhaustion. That’s why you need to prioritize self-care whenever you can.

  When you’re busy focusing on everyone else’s needs, it’s important to take some time to consider what you need. Ask your partner if they can provide you with some free time so that you can relax and do things you love.

  Even if it’s just going on a walk by yourself or visiting a friend, it can go a long way.

  2. Delegate to capable family members 

  Although you may feel like you need to do everything alone, most of the time, you don’t. Family caregivers don’t just have to be you and your partner — if you’re kids are old enough, ask them to play a part. 

  Next time you need some space for yourself, delegate dinner to your partner for a few nights a week. You can also ask your kids to pitch in for chores.

  Consider asking an independent family member for support where you need it, too. If you have siblings who can help you out, ask them to take care of your elderly parent from time to time. They could also provide childcare a night or two a week.

  However, if your siblings live far away, consider asking them for help with things they can do from afar. For example, they could provide financial support to care for your aging parents if their situation allows it. They could also manage doctors’ appointments for you.

  3. Seek support groups

  Try to find a safe place where you can get advice from people who experience the same daily challenges as you. A support system is essential when you’re balancing parent care, childcare, and everything else in your life. 

  You could join an online group for caregivers or look near you for local meetups. These people can help provide emotional support. Some online groups also offer more specific support. For example, this Facebook group was created for people caring for those with Alzheimer’s and dementia.

  4. Get senior care

  Various types of senior care exist depending on what you and your aging parents can afford. Home care services help with housekeeping, meal preparation, transportation, and companionship.

  Registered health care professionals provide home health services. They can support your aging relatives with medical supervision, administering medication, providing rehabilitation, and much more.

  Your health insurance or Medicare can typically cover home healthcare. But regular home care isn’t health-related, so it usually won’t be covered.

  If you can’t afford home care, other options are available if you need some time to yourself. For example, you can get respite care. This is a short-term relief given to primary caregivers and can give you as little as an afternoon or as long as several weeks. Sometimes just an afternoon is enough to help you take care of yourself.